A 13-year-old girl student of a school has gone missing since Wednesday morning.
A few days back, Bangalore woke up to the news of a teenager missing and several messages followed on WhatsApp and Facebook after that. For the next two days, her parents were clueless and strangers were also trying to help them by forwarding the messages to friends and family members.
This incident again made me think about flaws in our education system and about the way some parents put pressure on their kids. This is not the first incident related to the pressure of studies. Every day, we read in newspapers that kids commit suicide or run away from their homes due to the pressure of studies. It breaks my heart to see kids going through this kind of pressure.
But, on the other hand, what that girl did was also not right and justified. We need to teach our kids to –
- Be strong– As nobody knows what future holds for us, so, we should be prepared to face anything in life.
- Do not run– Running away from tough situations is not the answer. (I can’t even imagine what Poojitha’s mom must have gone through when she was missing).
- Stay calm– Whatever the situation stay relaxed and calm. Everything has a solution.
- Talk to your parents– It is very important to share everything with your parents or teachers. If there is anything which is bothering you, talk to your parents.
- Face fears– Teach them to face any kind of fear. It can be a fear of failure as we as parents set high expectations. Tell them that it’s ok to fail. Trying is more important and winning is not everything in life.
Parents want kids to succeed and do well but they should not get overly involved. When they get overly involved and pressurise their kids they lose sight of the negative impact it can have on their child.
I think it’s important for kids to understand the difference between right and wrong but it is also important for parents to understand them and guide them in the right direction.
DO NOT PRESSURISE YOUR KIDS. PLEASE REMEMBER EVERY CHILD IS DIFFERENT. LET THEM FLOURISH AND LET THEM GROW.
Also read, tips to beat exam stress.
Image courtesy- Pixabay
September 7, 2016 at 1:29 pm
I did see those posts about Pujitha and the her being found but i didnt know the whole story and its heartbreaking. Children should be taught a lot of things and your list is super critical . I guess , sensitive and smart parenting is the need of the times. Instead of a disciplinarian approach .. and I vouch for that. A good second post Deepa!
September 7, 2016 at 2:48 pm
Yes Chandni..being a mom of a teenage girl myself..this incident was scary and the sad part was that it looked like some publicity stunt when she came back as she was shown giving interviews all over the TV channels as if what she did was something great..Well..this is a different story altogether and I can write full one blog on this one too..Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts:)
September 7, 2016 at 7:55 pm
Very good post. Staying calm is something really tough though. But if this is taught at a tender age, it’ll be easy for kids in future.
September 7, 2016 at 10:07 pm
I know Atul..Its better said than done but its important to at least teach them whatever we can about life ..Thanks for stopping by 🙂
September 7, 2016 at 9:08 pm
I have also been wondering about the future of this generation. Values that our kids are growing with scare me.
September 7, 2016 at 10:10 pm
Exactly..its scary but parents also need to understand that times have changed and they should also change their approach towards parenting..Thanks for reading and sharing your thoughts Prerna 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 12:39 am
Right now I am thinking of how to teach my 1 year old to calm down and sit down at one place for 1 minute. without You Tube!!!
September 9, 2016 at 9:10 am
Haha..he is too small to understand ..let him run around and enjoy his childhood..Thanks for stopping by Tina 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 12:41 am
Perfect tips for new era parents to get control over their kids
September 9, 2016 at 9:11 am
Thanks a lot for stopping by 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 9:54 am
It is such a thin line we toe these days with our kids. With the kind of exposure they get and the resources available I think our perspective on parenting and teaching kids in general needs to change.
September 9, 2016 at 11:41 am
Agree Jaibala..Thanks for stopping by 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 3:00 pm
Such an apt post in today’s scenario, Deepa! True that it requires joint efforts from both parents and kids to keep things calm and balanced. Keep writing!! 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 3:56 pm
Thanks a lot Saumy for reading and sharing your thoughts 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 4:48 pm
Dear Deepa, I just read out the 5 points you so aptly highlighted in this post to my son…needless to say I found them really really worthy, keep up the good work.
September 9, 2016 at 5:45 pm
Thanks roma..glad you liked it 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 5:38 pm
Being a father, I absolutely agree with your views, especially the last line.. not to pressurize the kids.
September 9, 2016 at 5:47 pm
Thanks Rohan..glad you can relate to it 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 8:19 pm
Those tips are so apt for today’s world and I’m glad you jotted them down. Perfect tips!
September 9, 2016 at 11:04 pm
Thanks a lot for reading shalz 🙂
September 9, 2016 at 11:28 pm
Hi Deepa, A wonderful post. Not just kids, but we could all use those lessons in life. But the challenge here is to not teach, but embody these values, put them into practice and set examples. It is easy to try to teach, but living what we teach others is a challenge. Also, kids learn mainly through imitation, so between what is taught and what is practiced by the teacher/parent, kids are more likely to imitate what was acted out then listen to what is being said.
This reminds me of a wonderful advice given by a spiritual leader to a worrying parent who wanted to know how to raise good kids. He simply said, ‘You don’t have to raise kids, you just have learn to be a good parent.’ by which he implied, you just have to raise yourself, if you can do that then there is no need to worry about raising kids.
September 9, 2016 at 11:44 pm
Agree with you that we parents need to change our approach first and only then our kids will be comfortable sharing everything with us..thanks a lot Omkar for stopping by and sharing your thoughts 🙂
September 10, 2016 at 8:18 pm
Didn’t know about this case but as you mentioned this is sadly just another example of the flaws in our education system and the way passing / failing / low marks / high marks are seen by our parents, our peers and the society in general.
Along with the points you mentioned, I would also like to add that parents should teach their children to understand that one shouldn’t should be scared of failures. One should instead look at them as an opportunity to understand what needs to be improved so that they can succeed thereafter.
September 10, 2016 at 8:44 pm
Yes Aseem..lot of changes are needed..still a long way to go before we can change parents mindset towards all this..Thanks for stopping by 🙂
September 17, 2016 at 8:03 am
Fear is a very important aspect that needs tone dealt with. Love your article!
September 17, 2016 at 9:41 am
Agree..Thanks for visiting Nidhi 🙂
September 19, 2016 at 8:57 pm
Parents need to read your pointers here for sure.
September 19, 2016 at 10:32 pm
Thanks Sneha for reading 🙂