G for Guilty
~ I do not give time to my kids and I feel bad about it.
~When I go to the office, I feel guilty of leaving them in Daycare.
~I am not working and feel guilty of sitting at home.
~I am going out of the town for work, hope my kids will be okay.
We moms feel guilty for everything but the good news is you are not alone.
Working moms feel guilty of leaving their kids and going to work. Stay at home moms worry about not going to work or doing something.
We also feel guilty when we miss the school events like PTM’s, annual day or sports day.
To make the matters worse, there are people who judge us for whatever we do or not do. I feel it’s best to ignore what others say or think about you. And just do what you think is the best for you and your child.
I am a freelance dietician, run an activity center and a dance school. One of my relatives asked me a few days back, “Are you working?”
And I told her about everything I do and she asked, “That I know but you don’t work, right?”
So, according to her if I am running my own business or doing everything from the comfort of my home, it is not equal to a job.
Now I should feel guilty about that?
My answer is NO because this is something I wanted to do and feel lucky that I am able to follow my passion. A few years back, I took this decision of not leaving my girls in a daycare and I have no regrets. I had my own reasons for it and strongly believe that moms have this sixth sense which helps them to take a right decision for their kids.It doesn't matter if you are a mompreneur or a working mom, what matters is that you are happy doing it. Click To Tweet
As a fellow mom, I want to say to all other moms–
I am writing about Parenting for A to Z challenge and sharing my thoughts as a mother of a teen and a tween. I will be sharing my personal experiences as a mom and hope to help other moms and also learn from them through this challenge. Read all posts here.
A for Affection
B for Believe
C for Confidence
D for Dance
E for Extracurricular
F for Food
April 8, 2017 at 12:31 am
That relative is pissing me off – I would make faces at her!!! Thank god i am not guilty alone.
April 8, 2017 at 12:44 am
Thank you Tina
April 8, 2017 at 8:34 am
Ha ! I hate these people who feel that if you are a housewife you are doing nothing. They make me feel ‘guilty’ for NOT WORKING!!!! How dumb is that. I tell all women – be yourself . Work if you want. Don’t work if you can’t. BUT DON’T FEEL GUILTY for doing whatever it is you are doing
April 8, 2017 at 9:29 am
I hate this concept too and I believe housewives are the ones who work really hard and its their choice. Who are others to judge her? Thanks for sharing your thoughts 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 8:57 am
Oh! Thank God, everyone feels guilty. When I see those supermom’s who are all sorted, I think I am the only one who has lost it 😛 Thanks for assuring
April 8, 2017 at 9:30 am
Neha you are a supermom and every mom is a super mom. No one is perfect but everyone is doing best for their kids. Thanks for reading 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 11:26 am
Wow. Even after explaining to her… rude!! I know myself I feel mom guilt frequently. :/ Its hard!
April 8, 2017 at 11:57 am
Thanks for reading 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 11:35 am
Deepa ,what exactly does that particular relative do ?Maybe she has definition of working .Society and the government need to understand working =productivity .Not a particular location for sitting .Super post
April 8, 2017 at 11:58 am
She is an elderly lady Amrita. Thanks for reading..glad you liked it 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 12:01 pm
As you rightly pointed out I sometimes feel guilty for not being there for my sonny in his initial years and the world only aggravates it my repeated making inhuman remarks.
April 8, 2017 at 12:08 pm
The sad part is others make it difficult for moms. Thanks Roam for reading:)
April 8, 2017 at 1:12 pm
I’ve been a stay at home mom and a working mom. Both have their pros and cons. It also depends on the persoonality of the chld. I was lucky that when I was a working mom I had my parents to look after my child.
April 8, 2017 at 1:22 pm
Agree Suzy. Its about being happy in whatever you do. Thanks for stopping by 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 1:45 pm
That is so true Deepa, it is always people will judge and try to make a woman feel guilty it is important tgat we women ourselves donnot feel guilty ourselves. Specially moms. All moms are the best moms and doing their best already. I am also participating in AtoZchallenge, do read my short story
April 8, 2017 at 3:48 pm
Thanks Smita 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 2:01 pm
I used to be that guilty mum at work. No more now 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 3:48 pm
Thanks Yvette 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 2:59 pm
I am not a mom yet and still have people ‘telling’ me what would be right or wrong for my kid. As a soon-to-be-mom, this post brings relief that I will not be alone with this feeling.
April 8, 2017 at 3:51 pm
First of all congrats Disha. Thanks for reading 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 3:16 pm
Some people are so good at being emotional manipulators and have the power to make you feel like you’re a bad mommy. We all have different styles of working and doing things and make different choices. But the heart of the matter is that we do all that for the best of our child. So yes, we must quit feeling guilty for our choices!
April 8, 2017 at 3:54 pm
Bang on Shilpa.Moms should stop feeling guilty about everything. Thanks for reading 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 5:32 pm
I don’t know why people feel the need to make others feel bad! Thank you for the supportive words, going to send this to my mum so she knows not to feel guilty that she was a working mum.
April 8, 2017 at 6:49 pm
Thank you 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 7:29 pm
Your girls are blessed to have a mom who puts them first. Relatives and other people need to be supportive. Women give themselves enough guilt as it is.
April 8, 2017 at 7:59 pm
Yes ..we women need to stop feeling bad for ourselves. Thanks Ishita.
April 8, 2017 at 8:48 pm
Oh I’ve been through that “not working” bit! People think that if a woman is a freelancer or has her own business, she is “velli”! Weird society.
Chicky @ http://www.mysteriouskaddu.com
April 8, 2017 at 8:56 pm
Thank you Kaddu 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 10:26 pm
Hi deepa, so true this guilt factor. I agree with the sixth sense we have..
Interestingly I wrote on G for goals, guilt and grief ! Here are the two most inspirational yet sensible ideas that appealed to me https://archanablogs.wordpress.com/2017/04/08/g-for-goals-and-guilt/
April 8, 2017 at 10:50 pm
Thank you Archana for stopping by 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 10:48 pm
I am having trouble getting over your relative who thinks you don’t work – even after explaining it! I am hopeful that these views are starting to shift. I like that more dads are staying home now and moms are working. And that how we work is shifting from the view of it only being an “in the office 9 to 5”. I like to think that, to an extent, we have some power in choosing the life that fits us. But I also think society – at least in Canada where I live – is starting to shift to accommodate the realities of different life stages and ways to earn a living.
So re: mom guilt? I generally have worked through this, and don’t usually suffer from it.
April 8, 2017 at 10:52 pm
That’s great to know Louise. Here also the things are changing but it will take time. Thanks for reading and sharing your views 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 11:16 pm
The world will always find a reason or two to guilt trip moms irrespective of how much they love and care for their family. They are forever under scrutiny. Peace in a mom’s life begins when she stops being affected by what the world thinks or says about her and goes only by her heart and gut.
April 8, 2017 at 11:57 pm
Yes..its important to ignore and not get affected. Thanks for stopping by 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 11:27 pm
I am awful for the Mom guilt. When I was working I felt it, now I’m at home I feel it. Your relative needs a gentle reminder that you may work harder than them 🙂
April 8, 2017 at 11:58 pm
I agree..Thanks for reading 🙂
April 9, 2017 at 7:43 am
Yes, people have to say something or the other, as if they are experts! But a woman/mother knows best, how things work for her and her family well. Nice post!
April 9, 2017 at 9:46 am
Thanks ..glad you liked it 🙂
April 9, 2017 at 7:43 pm
Good post. I don’t have kids yet but I can definitely relate to it.
April 9, 2017 at 8:10 pm
Thank you 🙂
April 9, 2017 at 8:34 pm
Well, I guess they just don’t experience being a mommy yet or maybe no idea how to be a mother. I am not yet a mom but I understand that being a full time mom is as hard as working in the office or most of the time more stressful being a mom.
April 9, 2017 at 8:58 pm
Thank you Anosa 🙂
April 10, 2017 at 12:26 am
I think feeling guilty is more a woman’s thing. We fee guilty all the time. I’m not a mother, yet I feel guilty sometimes for not giving that much time to my MIL… if I have to go somewhere, I fee guilty for leaving all the household stuff and the list is on…
I guess we’re wired that way!
April 10, 2017 at 12:42 am
Agree..not only moms but women feel this way and we need to start ignoring few things to enjoy life. Thanks Geets.
April 10, 2017 at 8:25 am
Wow, i am guilty of not working and being at home. That’s why i blog!?
April 10, 2017 at 9:22 am
Blogging is working too. That is what others need to understand. Thanks for reading 🙂
August 17, 2017 at 9:43 pm
Moms definitely cannot feel guilty. There’s so much they sacrifice and this is just what brings them down.