I wrote about mommy hacks in my previous post to makes a mom’s life easier. And, I feel if kids are independent then it’s a bonus for us moms. So, today sharing my thoughts about raising an independent child.
My elder one is pretty independent right from the starting. She completely studies on her own and only asks us if she really has any problem. When she was small, she was always ready to go with the guests who used to come to our house. I remember my husband once got all emotional and said, “She is so independent and extrovert that when she grows up, she will leave us and go.”
And I must tell you that she was just 4 years old at that time. We still laugh whenever we remember this.
But, I really feel it’s good to be independent and not a clingy child. My teenager is so independent that she feels odd if we ask her if she needs any help with anything.
On the other hand, younger one was little clingy when she was small. But, I guess younger ones learn a lot from their older siblings. She is still learning to be independent and manage stuff on her own when I am not around.
I have seen a lot of incidents where kids are so dependent on the parents that they have a hard time coping up when they grow up and go to a hostel.
One of my relative’s son who is in engineering college had a hard time coping up with hostel life as he was completely dependent on his parents for everything. Imagine, parents of an 18-year-old boy being worried about him travelling in a local bus alone or waking him up in the morning for college. They wake him up by calling on the phone from another city. Isn’t it too much?
Well, these are just a few examples but there are a lot of such incidents after which we have decided not to make our kids dependent on us for anything.
The process of being independent is long sometimes but we need to teach them and guide them. I know it’s easier said than done but believe me it’s worth it.
I am writing about Parenting for A to Z challenge and sharing my thoughts as a mother of a teen and a tween. Sharing my personal experiences as a mom and hope to help other moms and also learn from them through this challenge. Read all posts here.
A for Affection
B for Believe
C for Confidence
D for Dance
E for Extracurricular
F for Food
G for Guilty
H for Hacks
April 11, 2017 at 5:31 am
This one is a tricky one in modern life. I am currently starting to let my 7-year-old play on the street by herself if she stays within view of the house – and she has walked home from the pool on her own (with me watching) a couple times. Baby steps and all that. As for doing her own homework – we’re working on that as well. But I agree they need to learn to do it without our help. Otherwise how will they learn?
April 11, 2017 at 8:48 am
7 year old is small..She will need your help. But once they grow up ..we need to make them more independent. Thank you Louise 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 11:06 am
Very very valid post. I realised this a couple of years ago when my sonny was still tiny and started taking small steps to make him independent and the journey continues for us
April 11, 2017 at 11:14 am
Thanks Roma..Glad you liked it 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 12:27 pm
Yes I want to raise Bluey as an independent and self sufficient child once he’s a little elder. Do his own chores and help others in the house.
April 11, 2017 at 1:17 pm
Thanks Tina 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 1:43 pm
This is true I always feel we Indian parents aren’t really focusing on making our children independent.. It starts from a very young age when we tell them to do small things on their own. It works as a precursor to being a far more independent individual later in life
April 12, 2017 at 11:41 am
Agree Ramya. It starts from the childhood and very difficult teach later in life. Thanks for reading 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 1:59 pm
A very important lesson.I am pretty independent too.I read somewhere that children when they grow up need watchful neglect.Keep an eye ,but don’t solve all their problems.Superb advice Deepa.I try to do this very thing with my 5 year old
April 11, 2017 at 3:26 pm
Thanks Amrita 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 2:46 pm
Independent Children are a boon to parents but parents really realise that. Mollycoddling is very common in India so I am not surprised at all to read about your relatives son!:)
Mayuri
April 11, 2017 at 3:35 pm
Thankyou Mayuri 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 5:04 pm
That’s definitely some important things to do. We should make our children grow independently!
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April 11, 2017 at 5:31 pm
Thanks Shalini 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 6:20 pm
I am the independent one 🙂 Your relative’s story reminded me of my cousin. He couldn’t adjust to the hostel life and hence his Mom had to shift to the city he was studying in to look after him. It is better to teach kids to be Independent at an early age to stop things like this happening later.
Introvert’s Life
April 11, 2017 at 9:01 pm
Thanks Swathi for reading 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 11:14 pm
Not just in today’s time but it’s kind of a universal thing for the kids to be independent! And if this happens at sooner stages in life, it makes them more decisive and helps them know what they really want in life!
Cheers
BoisterousBee
April 11, 2017 at 11:46 pm
Thanks Geet 🙂
April 11, 2017 at 11:39 pm
My son has been an independent child and now that he is in a boarding school, he is totally self reliant and responsible too. And this makes gives me a lot of satisfaction.
April 11, 2017 at 11:47 pm
Oh Thats really great Shilpa. Thanks for reading 🙂
April 12, 2017 at 1:41 pm
Very very valid point..Having a 2 year old i totally agree as making them do their stuff make them independent..They learn through mistakes
Very very valid post. I realised this a couple of years ago when my sonny was still tiny and started taking small steps to make him independent and the journey continues for us
April 12, 2017 at 1:44 pm
Very very valid point..Having a 2 year old i totally agree as making them do their stuff make them independent..They learn through mistakes
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April 12, 2017 at 2:05 pm
Thanks Menaka