First of all, I want to ask all the parents- Is competition a good, or a bad, thing for children?
I believe, it is good but unwanted and unhealthy competition is not good. Some parents have a different point of view as they believe it’s good for their kids. They think it’s a competitive world and kids should be competitive too. But I feel too much pressure can lead to bitterness and resentment in kids.
I observed this in my girls and learnt a lesson not to ever show the anxiety in front of them. I get very conscious when my girls go for a competition but my husband is better in this and handles the anxiety better. So, I am learning but one thing which we both make sure is to never push them unnecessarily.
[bctt tweet=”Let your kids flourish and grow at their own pace. Do not push them. #Parenting #Deewrites” username=”Deepagandhi1″]
I fail to understand those parents who push their kids for everything. I also think due to unwanted pressure from parents, kids can be just too hard on themselves when things don’t go their way. As they try to satisfy the demands of their parent or teachers and end up feeling that winning is the only way to gain the approval of the adults.
The kids should be told that not everyone can win a contest. If one child wins, another cannot. So, I feel that children always feel better about themselves when they actually work with others instead of against them.
Healthy competition inspires kids to do their best. Unfortunately, in our country, the frequent win-at-all-costs mentality associated with many competitions can reduce a child’s motivation. As a result, they might avoid activities they may otherwise enjoy.
Don’t go to the extreme when raising your child. Don’t over-schedule your child and bombard them with a million different activities, let them be creative, happy and healthy.
I am writing about Parenting for A to Z challenge and sharing my thoughts as a mother of a teen and a tween. Sharing my personal experiences as a mom and hope to help other moms and also learn from them through this challenge. Read all posts here.
A for Affection
B for Believe
C for Confidence
D for Dance
E for Extracurricular
F for Food
G for Guilty
H for Hacks
I for Independent
J for Joint or Nuclear
K for Kindness
L for Looks
M for Money
N for Nutrition
O for Overprotective
P for Poles apart
Q for Questions
R for Reading
S for Summer Vacations
T for Temper Tantrums
April 25, 2017 at 1:06 am
Don’t go to the extreme when raising your child. Don’t over-schedule your child and bombard them with a million different activities, let them be creative, happy and healthy.
This one needs to be given to all mothers .They forget that children need to have fun .Childhood is a time for happy memories right ?Superb post Deepa.
April 25, 2017 at 11:38 am
Thanks Amrita..glad you liked it 🙂
April 25, 2017 at 12:11 pm
Very well said Deepa. I see so many parents pushing their children to compete so hard that finally the child does not see any fun in the activity. It is very sad when that happens. It’s like taking away their childhood from them.
-Prasanna from Team Mocktailmommies
April 25, 2017 at 12:26 pm
Thanks a lot 🙂
April 25, 2017 at 4:15 pm
Pushy moms only land up even more frustrated than their children. You are absolutely right in not pressurising the kids. Each child is different and cannot be compared to another
April 25, 2017 at 5:41 pm
Thank you 🙂
April 25, 2017 at 5:14 pm
I agree, pressurising the kid leads you nowhere. Instead we must motivate them to give their ability best and that’s it !
April 25, 2017 at 5:42 pm
Thanks Roma
April 25, 2017 at 6:12 pm
So true Deepa. We really need to draw a line between healthy competition and saddling children with ambitions
Upset
April 25, 2017 at 7:17 pm
Thanks Neha 🙂
April 25, 2017 at 7:32 pm
Again, wonderful essential advice which every parent needs to know. This has been a beautiful series.
A Uruguayan called Jose
April 25, 2017 at 7:39 pm
Thanks Dr. roshan 🙂
April 25, 2017 at 9:11 pm
Someone wise once said a kid will be happy with a stick and a box. I couldn’t agree more. Let kids be kids, let them use their imagination and stop pushing them.
April 25, 2017 at 9:57 pm
Thanks cheryl 🙂
April 25, 2017 at 10:35 pm
Oh! Yes! Unwanted pressure should be a strict no-no! I have seen kids battling so much of esteem issue because of the pressure that their family puts on them! You’re really a wise parent, Deepa!
Cheers
BoisterousBee
April 25, 2017 at 10:52 pm
Hey thanks a lot Geet for the kind words 🙂
April 26, 2017 at 1:25 pm
Absolutely true!! It’s better to let kids grow at their own pace. Rather than pushing them into every field, let them figure out what they like and get competitive enough in just that field. It would help increase concentration, dedication and motivation.
Underdogs of the Literary World
Regards,
Pikakshi
Readers of the Night
April 26, 2017 at 1:43 pm
Thanks Pikakshi 🙂
April 26, 2017 at 2:19 pm
Unwanted pressure is the worst thing you can put on your child. I have seen many a child crack under it.
As always a sensible point of view from you, Deepa:)
April 26, 2017 at 2:44 pm
Thanks Mayuri 🙂
May 1, 2017 at 12:39 am
I feel that a little pressure is actually productive (look how I finished 26 posts under pressure 😀 ) However, parents these days have started pressurizing so much that kids have actually stopped enjoying the years that won’t come back again. I agree with your post and wish parents would understand that they have given birth to a child not a machine.
May 1, 2017 at 10:32 pm
Haha..Yes Anmol. Congrats to us all. We finally finished #AtoZchallenge. Thanks 🙂
May 3, 2017 at 11:27 pm
I am yet to get married but I feel these tips by you will be handy for me when I will become a parent. Congratulations on completing #AtoZChallenge. 🙂
May 4, 2017 at 9:36 am
Thanks Paresh:)